Too Much To Lose
by Reality Killed Us
Summary: Why is this any different than any of my other standoffs? The answer is that I have too much to lose. I have you, Elliot Stabler. My partner, best friend, and love of my life" during our fav scene in Spooked. Oneshot.


_Too Much To Lose_

_I got this idea listening to Russian Roulette by Rihanna… and it wouldn't leave my head until I wrote it and posted it. So here it is. It's during Spooked, which was epic. I just realized how intense this story is, but hey…maybe its good? Anyway…_

**Disclaimer: Not mine…. As always**

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The cool steel of the gun on my temple makes me shiver. I never used to be this way. I could be in a room with a crazy serial killer; bent on cutting me up in pieces, and not even break a sweat. Now, this man in holding a gun up to my head, and I can't stop crying.

Why is this any different than any of my other standoffs? The answer is that I have too much to lose. I have you, Elliot Stabler. My partner, best friend, and love of my life

I have every morning, waking up in your arms. I have the face you make when you're jealous, and the small snores you make when you sleep. I have all your hugs and small kisses we share at work. I have that smile that only comes out when you're truly happy.

I have the memories of us as well. Of when you walked up to my apartment and kissed me hard on the lips. When you told me that you wanted to be more than friends, and then I kissed you back. Of memories of nights spent together. When in was my birthday, and you got me an anthill, because you are one of the few people that know how obsessed with ants I am. When a case made us miss our date, so you made me a picnic in the precinct. Of all the times you've been there for me, no matter what.

I also have the future. Of moving in together. Of a proposal and of a wedding somewhere. Of yet another Stabler in this world. Of our first house. Of Christmases and Thanksgivings spent together. Of growing old together.

I have too much to lose. I can't lose you. The man cocks his gun and yells. My tear filled eyes meet yours. Your blue eyes are filled with anger. You're gun is pointed at him, ready to shoot him. But you wont. You wont risk it, no matter how bad you want to blow this guys brains out. And I only love you more because of this, because of your restraint.

Your eyes change. They now tell me to be brave, and I do as I'm told. I straiten myself and try to stop the flow of tears. I take deep breaths, wanting you to be the last though on my mind if this happens.

**BANG. **The shot rings through the clear air. I feel slightly cold. The man and I tumble down. You're at my side at once, wrapping your strong arms around me. Then it hits me, I'm not dead. The blood that covers me is not mine, but his. I tell you this, but you're still concerned. You unbutton my shirt slightly and when you're satisfied, you hug me closer. If all these people weren't here right now, I'd be kissing you right now. But your strong arms cradle me, and it's enough

"God Livia. Don't scare me like that. I thought I lost you," you mumble into my hair. "I love you so much El" I stutter. " I love you too Liv, so much" you say and tighten your arms even more.

Realizing that we're making a scene, I get up to my feet. I'm unsteady, but I lean on you, like I always do. I look for the person that fired the shot that killed my capture and almost killed me. There's Dean Porter with his gun still pointing where I'd been standing. Of course he did it. He killed the man. I look at you, and that look of jealousness creeps onto your features. I squeeze your hand. You wanted to take that shot. You wanted to be the one that saved me, wanted to be my hero. But what you don't know is that I love you more for not taking that shot. Dean could have killed me. You knew how risky it was, and even thought you wanted to show me what you could do, do didn't. Elliot, you are my everything. Without you, I would have nothing. Because of you, I have too much to lose.

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_ Do you like it?? Reviews are very much appreciated _


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